Chris here again with another article about marriage fitness. In this article I want to talk to you a little bit about dealing with marriage problems and how Mort Fertel teaches you how to deal with your marriage problems. The way that he teaches is actually a different than most traditional marriage counselors actually teach.
Before I go into this though I would like to tell you a little about myself in case you don’t know who I am.
About 6 years ago my wife and I were driving home when she turned to me and told me that she does not love me anymore, she wanted out of our marriage, she was throwing in the towel and she was done. That was a bit of shock to me but at the same it didn’t really surprise me. I had spent so many years prior destroying our marriage due to drugs, alcohol, partying and keeping her waiting for me and worrying all hours of the night.
My wife I did try to do a little bit of marriage counseling but what we found is that we were paying someone to sit there and listen to us talk about all of our problems and he really wasn’t getting anywhere with us and helping us get through our marriage problems. So my wife ended up saying that she is done and didn’t want to do this marriage counseling stuff.
So I decided to go online and look around for different ways that I could solve my marriage problems. I started looking at different programs available online and I ended up coming across a program by Mort Fertel called marriage fitness. If you don’t know what marriage fitness is click here to check it out. Anyways originally my wife started to go through it with me and she listened to a couple of the audios but she was so checked out at that point that she really wanted nothing to do with it.
I continued on with marriage fitness by myself using the lone ranger track. At the time that I started we were living together and then she ended up taking the kids and getting her own place about a month later. A few months had passed and although I was diligently going through the marriage fitness program I still did not really feel like marriage fitness was working for me because my wife was still trying to push me away most of the time. I wasn’t really finding it easy to trust his system and trust what Mort Fertel was teaching but I still pushed forward, granted there were times when I had to step back and kind of re-evaluate and regroup and keep pushing forward.
But anyway, a couple months down the road I was talking to my kids on the phone and when we were done talking she told them “tell daddy that you love him” then afterwards she got on the phone and told me that she loves me as well. So within a couple months she went from telling me that she does not love me anymore to telling me that she loves me. From there were able to start dealing with our marital problems and renewing our marriage.
Marriage Fitness Deals With Problems A Little Differently
The way that Mort Fertel teaches to deal with your problems is a little different than the traditional way which is to take your problems and basically deal with them head on, trying to get to the root of the issue. The problem with this though is that often times it is not the right time to deal with those issues which causes more problems and conflict in your marriage.
Mort Fertel teaches a little different way, he teaches to take your problems and table them or put them on the back burner. Then start working on more positive relationship building habits that will actually make it easier to deal with your problems later on. You need to have a good strong foundation and wall built to protect your marriage from any harm that could come from dealing with your marriage problems. Sometimes the smallest issues actually end up being blown out of proportion if you don’t have a good strong foundation built.
Like I say instead of dealing with marriage problems when your marriage is at it’s weakest point, start building on more positive relationship building habits. Marriage fitness exercises teach you how you can use things like date night, talk charges, touch charges, business meetings and more in order to accomplish this.
6 years after my wife told me she wanted a divorce we look at things from back then that seemed to be huge issues and now we can really have in depth heart to heart conversations about them. We have a far better understanding of another and we can actually understand where one another was coming from at that point. Things don’t seem so big now because we have been able to build a strong foundation and wall to help protect us.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that we don’t have marriage problems anymore but the thing is because we have done the work and continue to do the work needed to build a strong marriage, we are able to easily work through all of our problems and issues. Sometimes even now there are things that we have to table and work through later if we don’t feel like right now is the best time to deal with them.
If you enjoyed this article, please comment down below and let me know what you thought. Also if you have been through or are going through marriage fitness I would love to hear your experience down below. And if you know someone who would enjoy this please share it with them.